It’s always been crazy to me how friends could grow apart, like at one moment you couldn’t imagine ever having a life without them. They’re the people you laughed the hardest with and cried the most too it’s the purest form of love because it’s built from shared innocence and its so rare to find that these days. It fizzles away with heartaches and heartbreaks and just the on goings of a mundane 9-5 or even the occasional bar romp where the actual indever never lives up to the hype. You can’t ever match a fantasy because, it’s just that it’s the only place in our minds where wanting more, hoping for more isn’t scary.
I made a friend when I was 14 years old, and honestly I was always meeting new people just because of the things that I was doing but it was different. I didn’t understand at the time because I mean let’s face it, no one knows how important someone is going to be in your life right when you meet them. And for all that was really known we kinda seemed like opposites like on the outside, I guess. She was the epitome of everything I wanted to be like just because she was so much herself in place and time that really did everything in its power to force the contrary. There she was, like it wasn’t a struggle or even a challenge that she was up for. She would just be. It was almost eerie. To be around someone who wouldn’t rather just be in her own skin but who made it her mission each and everyday to just be. She had the most brilliant mind and the way that she viewed people was what the world should have been like and for all her light I was so much the opposite side of the spectrum I would wonder most days how we were such good friends. I fell in love with the other side of who I was because of how easy she made it to show her and that’s something i’ll never forgive because it came with a lot of pain and a lot of self growth because I was going pound for pound everyday with this internal battle that I wouldn’t have even started if it wasn’t for the light that she brought.
We recently caught up and I haven’t actually talked to her in I want to say a year let alone physically seen here in who knows how long but it all comes back right when I saw her and as we talked I realized that she had grown so much that it scared me because she never even could fathom how special she was that she had the kind of something that was going to influence the world if she let it. Like, I love Her for the same reason Disney world is my favorite place in the world.
Just stay with me on this one,
like I remember going when I was young and it was just the most magical place in the world to me like it’s Like being a little kid and really truly believing that Santa was coming to your house. Then to come downstairs and see the gifts that you knew were from like that’s the purest feeling that kind of happiness like being able to believe in magic and that’s what she does to me she makes everything come alive because of her passion. It’s amazing because she’s one of the smartest people I’ve ever met and all she genuinely wants to do is share her love, her knowledge of whatever it is because she just wants you to feel it too even if its just for 5 minutes because she really truly believes in what she’s saying, and that’s magic.
I We talked for 2 or 3 hours and just sitting and talking to her honestly blew my mind because I had obviously assumed that we would get along, but I didn’t realize how much I missed her, but more so like how much i missed getting to see her become who she is. There is something that does bother me though I get the feeling that I really am seeing her for who she is and she’s trying to hide part of herself, but if she knew, like if she could see the way she can light up a room, or how she can say the most absolute right thing without a word at all its world changing. She is going to do such amazing things it almost scares me but i think that’s the beauty of it though she came in scaring me and that’s how she’ll go out.
Caught in the Webb 